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Maintaining Relationships


Mon, August 25, 2008 6:46 PM

I have been dating a wonderful man who has been dealing with Crohn's for many years.  He is a giving individual who truly enhances my life.  However, one of his Crohn's related problems is gas.  I am trying to be as supportive as possible, but the odor is overpowering.  We have tried a large candle, deodorizing spray and opening doors and windows for cross ventilation.  However, if the weather is cold and we can't get all the windows open, the amount of spray needed to deodorize the room is enough that it causes embarrasment.  I can see from your posts that this is a physically and emotionally wearing disease and I don't want to add anymore stress to his life.  If anyone has any tips on how to balance the relationship support for both of us (deodorizing the room without causing a large amount of embarrasment) I would greatly appreciate it.  I have to believe that there are other people who have dealt with this problem and successfully maintained relationships.

 

 

 

 

FPO laquinta
Joined Aug 25, 2008

Thu, September 18, 2008 11:45 AM

 Reply posted for laquinta.

My daughter is dating a boy who has Crohn's and she has been his rock.  She has done research on the disease and she is very supportive of him.  They are both 17.  It has been a hard year for him.  He started having symtoms in Nov 2007 and it took till Feb for them to diagnose him. The dr kept telling him he had this or that and would treat him but the symptoms would not go away.  So finally they did an endoscopy and found that he had Chrohns.  We took him on vacation with us to California in April and he was on some kind of medication and was also taking acidopholis.  We drove and had to stop many times for him but it was worth it. He had a great time on the trip despite feeling sick. Although without all the stress at home he actually did pretty good and was not in too much pain.  It was the first time he had ever been on  a trip like this and I know he had so much fun. He is really struggling with school though because when he feels bad he doesnt want to go and he has a stressful home life which we know can affect this disease.  My daughter is the one thing in his life that makes him really happy. And we really like him alot.

                                                            Yvonne

FPO yvonnemarie
Joined Sep 18, 2008

Fri, September 05, 2008 12:00 AM

 Reply posted for joymc84.

I am so glad you brought this up! I have been dating my bf for 2 yrs and man does it get stinky!! He uses the bathroom in his bedroom to do all his "stuff" in and the odor just kind of lingers in that room. He knows it too.  I told him that tomorrow we are going to get incense. How and where do others keep their used ostomy bags? He puts his in ziploc bags in the enclosed garbage can in his bathroom, but when you open that can up to throw another one in, here comes the stink....
I love him to death and am pretty much used to it all. I finally am comfortable with answering honestly if it/he stinks. "Yes!" I told him if HE can smell it, than I can smell it, that he doesn't have to ask.
He loves going thru the house spraying Febreze and spraying me too!

Diane

FPO dolinger1
Joined Aug 26, 2008

Wed, September 03, 2008 12:00 AM

 Reply posted for laquinta.

you are a great girlfriend to be so compassionate and concerned about your boyf! i have crohn's, and we can be a stinky bunch. when my husband and i are together and a stink arises, i usually blame it on the dog, lol. but seriously, besides what you are already doing (the air freshener, candles, etc.), i'm not sure what more you can really do about the gas. however, hopefully in time y'all will be able to drop the embarassment you both feel when things get stinky. he knows it stinks, you know it stinks, so don't worry about the amount of air freshener you're spraying.  it's just a part of having crohn's, and you kinda just have to ignore it and move on. i hope one day, maybe y'all can even laugh when it happens, and go to another room or something...that's when my husband and i do!

FPO joymc84
Joined Jun 17, 2008

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