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I think I am at the end of my rope these days I cry at the drop of a hat I am in a lot of pain and have bloody diarrhea I also have issues with some nerve damage that I hope to have a liitle info on Thursday after a consult with a neurologist.I know something is not right with my body these days I can feel it whos knows you better than you but what do you tell a Dr? I am so sick today but had to come to work in fear of losing my job since I dont yet qualify for FMLA.I do not know if I will make it through the day or not i am ready to just quit the job and stay home but cant do that have bills to pay.I hate having to choose between my health and a job its really not fair and I know life is not fair but why do people who are so sick have to make this choice every day. People say try not to stress out and you need to take care of yourself well everything in my life stresses me out and how do you take care of yourself when you cant if I could just have a little time to just do nothing and to not have to worry about crap all the time and maybe give my body a little time to heal but I guess I will keep dreaming and I hate to say it but some days I wish they would fire me..........Ok I am done venting for now thanks for listening

 Reply posted for wesson48.

Hi I just read your post...I have had Crohn's disease for 28yrs. I just finally had a double bowel resection...my ileum removed and part of my colon....within two months of the surgery I had Crohn's symptoms AGAIN! I was scared and thought it came back and it did. My Dr never put me on preventaqtice meds until Sept and my surgery was July 8 2009. My Dr swore it was not Crohn's until I had a sigmoidoscopy the end of Sept. I could barely walk I was in so much pain and to go to the bathroom I was screaming it was the worst pain i have ever expericencd. They say I have the Crohn's back now in my lower colon near the rectum and called it Perianal Crohn's. I am so beside myself....once again on steroids and receiving a new injection called Cimzia and taking pentasa. I am an emotional wreck and dealing with alot of pain. On top of it all I work fulltime. My husband wants me to apply for disability permanently but i am afraid. Do you have any advice and do you think I will qualify?

 Reply posted for msalanui.

It will get better.  I promise....it will.  I remember feeling as though I was dying because I was in so much pain and had lost so much weight.  I definitely needed to be at work, but had no physical strength to be there.  I didn't know I had Crohn's at that time.  It took a long time for my "gut" to heal.  I'm still not 100% but I am so much better than I was.  Keep your head up.  Take one day at a time.  Keep a journal...it helps you remember the good days so during the bad days you can read it and know that a good day is ahead.  You will get better!!!  

 Reply posted for GGM.

Kinda sounds like we are in the same boat i reaaly am at the end of my rope these days i have been so sick and yet here I am at work wanting to go home cause i feel so bad. I am sorry the Remi isnt working for you it worked for me for the most part.

 Reply posted for msalanui.

I, too, know how you feel.  Sometimes I think "if I could just stay home, maybe I wouldn't have the stress of working fulll-time and it would help me get better".  There is no end for me in sight either.  If I don't work, my family will be in a huge amount of trouble, and I will have no health insurance.  The treatments aren't working for me.  Just had my third infusion of remicade last week and the symptoms are back already.  I'm not 40 yet, and I don't know long I'm going to go on like this.  I have a 3 year old boy, and I try to envision watching him grow up but with the way I feel, I don't really see it.  Obviously I'm an emotional wreck.  I'm sorry you are going through such troubles also.

 Reply posted for msalanui.

Hello! I understand what you are going through.  I am sorry that you aren't doing well.  I was scared about losing my job as well, until I met someone else with Crohn's on another website and told me I should apply for social security disability benefits.  I called a paralegal who specializes in disability and it turns out I can get benefits!  The reason I tell you this is because I had to stop working due to my condition and my bills started piling up.  I hope this helps!  Remember, if you ever feel like emailing me to vent or just to talk about your condition, I am always here! 

 Reply posted for msalanui.

Please seek out some help, a friend, a relative, someone professional, someone at church, a hot line, a neighbor, a doctor, anyone who will listen. One positive thing about working is that you don't have too much time to think about your predicament. Sleep is good medicine, try and get plenty. Hang in there. We all care about you.

                               Joe

 Reply posted for Joe.

Thanks Joe I really do consider myself a strong person I have been through alot esp lately with this disease I also think sometimes I am being tested I have always been told we are not given more than we can handle but I really am at the breaking point...

 Reply posted for msalanui.

My UC started in 1985. I just joined this forum a couple of months ago. I didn't know it existed. I feel so bad for you. This is all so sad, especially for the children. Just keep writing on this forum as much as you feel like. Sometimes I think this is all a test to see just how much a person can take before they crack. If it helps to know, I havn't cracked yet. I just keep getting back up everytime that I get knocked down. It is what you must do. I'm not a religious person, but I'm thinking about you and hoping that you get better.

                                            Joe