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I'm about to burst into tears! I know I've been posting left and right on here... and probably seem like an emotional wreck to anyone who's read any of my posts that range from optomistic, to gloomy... begging for advice, or trying to give it. I don't know... maybe I've just been googeling too much. This is my 3rd day post ileostomy, and I've tried and tried to reassure myself that things will be okay looking online for sucess stories, and have now got myself down in the dumps bc I can't find them. Isn't this ever going to stop? I FREAKING HATE THIS DISEASE. Please tell me that somewhere out there someone with Crohn's can tell me that this gets better.  I can't take it anymore. I just want to cry and cry and cry. I don't want to feel so desperate anymore. I need major major emotional help right now.

 Reply posted for NeverEnding.

u  r not alone in what u r experiencing...u r just the voice for many who have suffered. It will get better, it does, so give urself the gift of time. b proud to voice what others keep to self becuz the reailty of this disease is harsh and others feel the same, just afraid to express self, feeling misunderstood. keep your goal in mind that the worst of this is behind you and each day will improve.

 Reply posted for Becky G.

Thank you. I'm already starting to feel much MUCH better than I had been when I wrote that post. Those first couple of days after surgery were stressful, but I am adjusting, and starting to see that this is just another part of who I am... gotta embrace it.

 Reply posted for NeverEnding.

I'm not a "regular" on this board - so I don't know what brought you to surgery but I I wanted to share my son's experience with you.

After a number of years of dealing with crohns-colitis, he elected to have his colon removed. He was tired of all the drugs, restrictive diets, not getting to a full remission and always wondering when the next big flare was going to happen. He was in his early 20's and he wanted his life.

That was two years ago. He now has a very active life. He just completed his first year of law school. He works out and plays sports - previously he could not even hold a part-time job. He enjoys going out to trendy restaurants and having friends over for a BBQ. He has a wonderful, supportive girlfriend.

Adjusting to the ileostomy did take time. There was a period of "what the **** did I do?" but in retrospect he would have done it earlier.  He did see a therapist to help him adjust and took antidepressants for quite a while.

I just wanted to let you know that it does get better and the feelings of depression and anxiety are perfectly normal.

 Reply posted for NeverEnding.

oh my goodness!!! you can't say *** on here???? that in itself just made me laugh a little to be honest.  thank you for your replies... and today was actually a little better... i actually feel capable of adjusting  i'm so glad for this site. and the colorectal surgeon who is taking care of me has been phenomonal... he called and spent a very decent amount of time on the phone with me making sure everything was okay, and really, i asked a lot of questions about every little thing, and he was extremely patient and seemed in no rush to be done with the conversation at all like so many other doctors seem to be. it made me feel a lot better that he seemed unworried about my progress and confident that i'll feel better.

when i first signed up for this site i was leery that i'd just meet a bunch of weirdos on the internet ... but its been one of my very best resources so far and i'm so thankful for all the people here who just are happy to help each other out. what a refreshing thing to know these days!

(and now that i'm all calm again don't i really look like an emotional roller coaster... i hate to see what menopause does to me one of these days)

thanks again, and take care.

 Reply posted for Mom2One.

Geesh!!!

what is wrong with the words

don't

be

so

h a r d

on

yourself  ??

 Reply posted for Mom2One.

i am not sure why my words were ***

all i was trying to say was "please don't be so *** yourself"

 Reply posted for NeverEnding.

post surgery depression is very common...something with the anesthesia makes the chemicals in the brain plummet :(   it is so understandable how you are feeling...please don't be so *** yourself.  this disease is so hard physically and emotionally.  give yourself some time to just feel terrible...lay in bed, watch bad tv shows...whatever it is that you do to help yourself heal. it will get better!!! 

 Reply posted for NeverEnding.

It will get better.    You are only 3 days post ileostomy.......try giving yourself a bit more time.   Though my daughter and I haven't had the procedure, many people have, they have had their share of ups and downs, but you need to know they are able to live productive lives.   Please, give yourself a chance to adjust/heal.  Be well.

Lizzies Mom