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How do I help my parent understand they have a role in their care?

Fri, May 15, 2009 12:00 AM

I am a child to a person with Crohns. I want to support them and help them get the information to help treat their Crohns. This parent however refuses to alter their diet to improve their condition. I have printed out many diets and medical reccomendations for them. This person is a sugar addict. Fast food addict, fried food, caffine, chocolate. If its on the list not to consume they seem to eat it twice as much. The consequnce of course is that their spouse who is in much worse health has to try to maintain a job way past retirement to support them. I am so worried about both of them I can't sleep at night. I also question the doctor they are working with and their knowledge or willingness to help. Please help our family.

onthefarm
Joined May 15, 2009

Tue, June 02, 2009 2:42 PM

Reply posted for onthefarm.

I empathize with your dilemma, my husband has ulcerative colitis and thus far has not followed any of the suggestions I have made although he does listen to his doctor. My way of coping has been to pray for him, demonstrate that I love him and care about him (and because I shop and cook I can buy foods that I know are not problematic for him); and to listen when he has concerns and wants to talk about his illness.

For the past month he has had flare ups of the U.C., a virus that hung on for weeks, and chronic fatigue and depression (after he and his doctor decided it was time for him to get off prednisone). He has seen his dr. once, talked once on the phone, and is scheduled for a colonoscopy next Wed. I have had a really hard time, especially with the chronic fatigue and wanting him to be more active in exploring alternative ways to manage his symtoms. My expressions of anger and frustation have not helped and I have had to back off. I'm looking into caregiver support for myself and am talking with a therapist also.

I wonder if having support yourself like through other family members with persons with Ulcerative Colitis or couseling or therapy for yourself might help. Tring to help a parent who does not want help is difficult and challenging; as is maintaing your own balance, sanity, and life. Best Wishes, Jan

jan wileyegdall
Joined Jun 2, 2009

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