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Sports

Mon, April 05, 2010 3:29 PM

My son (14 years old; 8th grade) was diagnosed with UC 2 years ago and until recently was doing great. However, a couple months ago he got a virus that triggered a flare that we are having a hard time getting under control. He started his baseball season about a month ago and his coach is a very intimidating man...he barks at kids, he does not give positive feedback, he will not interact with parents, and my son is stressing himself out about it, even on days when he doesn't have practice. My son has always been the ideal participant in sports....he's always the first one to practice, he listens, follows directions, hustles, doesn't goof off, but he is feeling like he will get in trouble for any little thing, so he is constantly stressed during practice. He wants to quit playing. We have been making him attend practice in the hopes that things would improve, but they really haven't. We have always told our kids that when you make a commitment, you need to see it through to the end; however, we are feeling like because of his health issue, it may be okay to bend the rules this time. I should add that he has had the same group of coaches for the last several years; however, the freshman high school coach, which is the one my son is afraid of, offered to help coach this year, but has completely taken over. My son chose to play again this year thinking he was going to have the same coaches as he did previously.

Would love to hear if anyone has dealt with a similar situation and what you did about it and how it worked out. Any suggestions and/or input would be greatly appreciated.

thepattees
Joined Apr 5, 2010

Fri, April 09, 2010 9:28 PM

Reply posted for thepattees.

Let your son find something else to participate in. He is too young to be able to deal with this coach. By letting your son choose some other activity you will be teaching him that the behavior of the coach is unacceptable-period. Your son has enough on his plate with IBD and being a teenager. Sports for kids should be fun.

Joe

joe
Joined Oct 24, 2019

Fri, April 09, 2010 12:00 AM

Reply posted for thepattees.

I agree, if your son is really unhappy with a horrible coach you should leave (I am the mom of a 14 yo baseball addict with CD). Yes, sports is sometimes about sticking it out, we believe that too, but kids should enjoy them, they shouldn't be punitive.

I would caution you, though, to make sure your son doesn't see his illness as the main excuse, especially because it sounds like you have legit reasons to be off this team anyway. This was a delicate thing for us when our son was flaring, most of 6th grade.

Good luck. Can you find him a different team? Or maybe a summer league if it's too late for the spring?

sandpiper
Joined Oct 12, 2008

Tue, April 06, 2010 8:13 AM

Reply posted for thepattees.

I am the mother of a 10 yr old daughter who has CD and has for 6 yrs now. Her father and I feel the same way and have instilled in both of our children that you make a commitment, you are in it for the long haul......we are not quitters.

Having said that, life is too short and we bent the rules this year too! My daughter decided to take flute lessons. I always had to remind her to practice, practice, practice. When it came time to renew for the next session, we decided I have to chose my battles carefully and it simply wasn't worth the fight.

Let's face it, our families operate at a higher level of anxiety to begin with. Why add fuel to the fire. Put an end to the torture, find another recreational sport that doesn't add to the stress, but helps alleviate it!

Good luck!

Lizzies Mom

lizzies mom
Joined Sep 9, 2009

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