Being 20 and the struggles
Wed, October 17, 2012 12:51 AM
I was diagnosed with Severe Ulcerative in August of 2011 when I was 18. It hospitalized for many months and was so severe I had my colon removed in December of 2011. I have had 9 kidney stones from the result of this disease and currently have one in my left kidney. I have had 7 blood transfusions. I have done remicade and Humira, prednisone and nothing really worked. I had my take down surgery February due to a kidney stone shutting down my system. I wasn't suppose to have the surgery until late march. Its been 8 months since my last surgery and I still don't feel up to par. Still having bloody stools and diarrhea and right now have a fever. I always have lower abdominal pain and my stomach always feels tender. The depression starts to kick in but Im not taking anything because I don't want to be dependent on anything anymore because I have had enough. Its frustrating because I have all these health issues and at times I want to take pain meds not just for the pain but because then I feel like a normal person I feel better about myself and only use the restroom about twice a day instead of 11 - 15. I don't think I have accepted any of this because this is not the reality that I know. I was never ever a smoker and I am still completely against it but I picked up the habit in rehab and right now my views are I don't care what else happens to me cause life hasn't seemed to show mercy on me any ways. Im going back on cypro(UGH) and have a couple of labs to do to see if there is an infection. I know there are many others out there that have the same condition as me but I feel no one can relate. I've contemplated going back to a bag so I know longer have to sit on that God forsaken toilet. I feel when I had the bag I actually felt better, but then again I was loaded on Percocet and Norco at the time. I dont know what to do I'd like some friends on here and some input.
Thanks - matt
Joined Oct 17, 2012
Mon, January 07, 2013 11:35 PM
Reply posted for matthewpool.
Matt I really feel for you with the depression...I haven't had anything neaarrrr as severe as what your going threw...but I do know how it feels to be so alone with it. If you ever need anyone to talk to, I'm an awesome listener..and I'll be sure to say some prayers for you as we'll. please stay positive and keep on going. You've made it this far. Idk how to inbox on here but I do have a Facebook if you need a friend. My name is Paige pastor and I'm from Missouri. Hang in there. I'm newly diagnosed with Crohns and its tough tryin to cope. This site really helps. Keep strong! 
Joined Jan 6, 2013
Fri, October 26, 2012 12:08 AM
Reply posted for matthewpool.
Matt,
Take a deep breath and please try to relax. I understand how frustrating it can be to deal with a chronic illness, but you are not alone! I would suggest talking with someone and brainstorm some ways to get your mind off your disease/relax. I would also suggest eating food that put less stress on your body (do an elimination diet). I hope this helps. If you have any more questions, I can try and answer them.
-Openears
Joined Mar 4, 2012