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Newly Diagnosed 14yo - School?


Sat, February 12, 2011 2:20 PM

Hi All,

Hope you are having a great weekend so far and Happy Valentines!!

My 14 yo daughter was diagnosed in January 2011 with UC. She has now been out of school for 6 weeks. Although the school has been understanding and supportive, my daughter is very nervous and scared to return to campus. She is feeling better but deals with daily changes. Mostly we are waiting to see when she goes into remission. I am encouraging her to return to school (she went one day 2 weeks ago and had an "episode" so I had to pick her up) but wonder when she should return. Any thoughts or suggestions on how to reintroduce her to school? I am following up with the school nurse next week and picking up the hard copy of the chronic illness paperwork the doctor sent to the school.

FPO mom2zm
Joined Feb 12, 2011

Sun, April 03, 2011 4:54 PM

 Reply posted for Mom2ZM.

Hello!

I'm a senior in high school and was diagnosed with Ulcerative Colitis this past summer.  Going to school with UC, especially in times of flares, is definitely hard.  I always have the fear that I'm going to get really sick in school and that every one's going to find out I have UC, which is something I like to keep private. We worked out a 504 plan with my school that makes everything easier. With the plan, I'm able to get up and go to the bathroom whenever I need, without having to ask permission and draw attention to myself. It also helps with excusing absences that I have from either feeling sick or the many doctors appointments. You may want to look into seeing if your daughter's school has one.

Also, while I completely understand that UC is a personal issue, I would suggest having your daughter tell a few of her closest friends (if they don't know already) what is going on.  I like to keep my UC quiet, but I have told my close friends and it's easier knowing that someone else knows and will be able to be there for you if need it. 

If your daughter would like someone to talk to, let me know! I would be glad to talk to her!

FPO ber64x
Joined Aug 12, 2010

Thu, March 10, 2011 8:05 PM

 Reply posted for Mom2ZM.

Hello...we have had situations w/school. We now homeschool just because we are in Honolulu...but while he was in school  and flaring...he would have his backpack with the essentials. The teachers were great and just let him leave w/out any questions or big deals...good luck and hang in there...

FPO victorsmom
Joined Feb 17, 2010

Fri, February 18, 2011 4:41 PM

 Reply posted for Mom2ZM.

I feel  your pain - truly I do.  My daughter, also 14, was diagnosed in Jan 2008 with UC.  That first year went fairly well, but by the end of March 2009 her world began to crumble.  She missed about 8 weeks of school, including 7 days in the hospital.  When she finally went back it was 1/2 days until the end of the school year.  That time we were fortunate that it was nearer the end of school, instead of the beginning like we have dealt with this school year.  My daughter attempts to go to school as often as she can - if she can't make it through the day, we pick her up, but the continuity of going (even if just part of a day) helps.  Does your school have a school psychologist to talk to in addition to the nurse.  Ours does and it has been helpful.

It is a life stealing disease for sure, and is especially hard for the teens to deal with.  Let's face it 14 is a difficult age when you are healthy.

I realize each school district is different, but something else for you to look into is "home bound education."  During a lengthy absence a teacher comes to our home for a couple hours each day and works over the lessons and/or any problem areas. 

If you're daughter would like to chat with someone her age that is going through this, please let me know - my daughter would welcome her.

FPO momofmouse
Joined Jul 2, 2009

Wed, February 16, 2011 8:16 AM

 Reply posted for Momcat.

Thank you all so much for your responses and helpful tips! She returned to school yesterday and made it through although she had a flare up the last hour. She was wiped out when she got home. I will look into 1/2 days for her. I have emailed the teachers and spoken with the nurse. So far the school has been outstanding in understanding. I really appreciate the support here. I hope that I can be as supportive as you all are! Take care!

FPO mom2zm
Joined Feb 12, 2011

Wed, February 16, 2011 1:13 AM

 Reply posted for Mom2ZM.

My 8th grade year I missed a lot of school..one term I had missed more days then I had attended due to Crohn's and feeling poorly overall. Like your daughter I was scared a nervous to go back. I didn't want all the where have you been and how are you feeling questions. I was also afraid that I wouldn't make it a full day and that would have upset me. My mom talked to the school and they made it so that I could go half days for a week or two just to get back in the swing of things. That helped so much! By the time I went to full days I knew I could do it or at least push through it :) Also I didn't give my friends and other kids enough credit. They were just happy I was back. 


I hope things go well for your daughter!
-Courtney

FPO court90
Joined Jan 25, 2011

Sun, February 13, 2011 10:14 PM

 Reply posted for Mom2ZM.

Hi There,

I am hoping your Valentines Weekend was a good one.

My daughter is 14 and was diagnosed almost one year ago. I have had to pick her up numerous times so I know what you must be feeling. I went to talk directly with the Principal and with the school Nurse and I e-mail her teachers on a regular basic, I feel lucky to have such a great repour with them all, I tell them what I would like to see happen and ask for their input as well as to what would work for them aswell. My daughter has missed many weeks of school but we have never had any problem getting work caught back up the teachers do their best and work with us. We are still working on getting her UC undercontrol but so far not having much luck. We are pretty new to this illness but we are always interested in what others have to say. I am trying to get my daughter to talk to other teens and I am always willing to talk to other parents. I just posted an update on my daughter (ONE SAD TEENAGER).

My thoughts are with you and your daughter.

FPO momcat
Joined Sep 29, 2010

Sun, February 13, 2011 4:09 PM

 Reply posted for Mom2ZM.

My 17 year old has a tough time getting back to school when missing a week or so.  You can talk to your daughters teacher and explain your daughters anxiety.  maybe contact from the teacher or friends may help alleviate her anxiety.  One thing my son doesn't want to is people asking, "how you doing, feeling better?"  they don't understand the slow process.  maybe the school nurse or councelor can talk to staff and some kids about your daughter coming back.  Our school councelor also mentioned that my son could come to a BB game or after school activity even when not in school to help get that initial anxiety over with.  Can she have a couple friends over for an initial contact? I am wishing you luck with everything.  Such a tough thing for a young child, and her family.  Hang in there.

FPO cougarmom
Joined Feb 4, 2011

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